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Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Lady phones and pink schedules

Spurred by a tale involving a dumb boy buying a ‘woman specific’ phone because it looks rather nice having not realised the hidden applications, I decided to look up women specific phones and see what great gadgets the designers in their highly paid ignorance dreamt up to tempt the ladies.

Said 'dumb boy' bought himself a Newgen C800, which in addition to having a camera, speakers and polyphonic ringtones is also modelled on a makeup compact, comes in baby pink, silver or, wait for it, pink AND silver, has stupid buttons that are sure to cause no end of mis-dial problems (see pic) and a pink schedule for recording your period.

Oblivious to the speedy developments of phone technology I had missed the introduction of women specific phones in recent history, their pink schedules, gross colour schemes, retarded interfaces. Newgen aren’t the only one’s jumping on the bandwagon out of town. There seem to be quite a few out there, Samsung, Siemens, all making a common mistake – why the fuck would women need phones modelled on makeup compacts that calorie count and record their monthly cycles? Women who are technologically advanced enough to want and use mobile phones are pretty unlikely to be as technologically retarded as to use the rhythm method methinks. And, just incase you didn't know, not all women are on perpetual diets.

Am I just being simple, but wouldn’t huge music and photo memory be better? Oh no, that’s how they promote the standard [ and by default, male specific] phones.

However, if they're really intent on marketing women specific phones, this might (ahem) stimulate some interest.

Photos tea-leafed from Shiny Shiny

4 comments:

TP said...

I can see it now:

bag rings
woman rummages
answers powder compact

It's a perfect rom-com sight gag, we should copyright it.

broke said...

nice one. completely depressing products. love the vibelet, though.

Anonymous said...

PS equally nauseating is the new Peugeot TV ad with the tag line "Men are back"... saw it the other night...

"'MEN ARE BACK' is the final
pay-off line in a new television commercial breaking on 1st February for the stunning new Peugeot 407 Coupe. The theme of the commercial is a theoretical world populated by women — no man appears in the commercial at all. In the final scene in comes the new 407 Coupe and we hear 'Men are back' voiced over. Strange, but true."
http://www.motorbar.co.uk/407coupe.htm

TP said...

Yeah, I saw that the other day - what a ridiculous ad concept.