DIY: snip snip

I have these ludicrous knee high gladiator sandals. I imported them from the USA, they were the only ones I could find in PU at the time and they came from a fancy dress supplier! They're rad, but I've had them for over a year, and have only worn them under trousers in that time. Despite my preconceived ideas of how I could rock the epic knee high sandals, I haven't. I don't think I can, they're bonkers.

I like 'em with trousers though.

Thing is, they have this tendancy to rotate around my leg, and they're a bit hot & not exactly easy to wear under (skinny leg) trousers.

Today I was thinking 'I could do with some non-knee high versions of these'.

So I think I'm going to cut the tops off.
Save money, save time, save resources. Win win win.

Vignette: Family values

My mum dropped in to see me yesterday

Mum: We went out with so and so and their daughter the other night, she looked really pretty.
Mum: You look pretty too, sometimes
Mum: Like when you wear some make up and have your hair down
Me: Thanks...
Mum: But not when you scrawp your hair back, and have no make up on, like when you came to see me at work the other week. You didn't look really pretty then.
Me: Yes I did.*
Mum: Aww [ed. patronising tone]

Ah, parents. Why do you say these things?

* Yes, I actually said that! Haha! Go self esteem.

Stick to the list

So, I've been ticking things off my recent wish list.

Bat for lashes album:
I like it. A reviewer for the Guardian Weekend Guide said it would only appeal to 'people who watch the Culture Show. Scumbags basically' That's me told, then.

The jeans:
I got them, with a discount code (yay!). But - they sucked. What a weird fit. Huge and too small at the same time. Kudos though to Howies who exchanged them for the mens version, all the while honouring the original discount. The mens ones are 100% better.

Strawberry hair:
Hello highlights and lowlights. My hair is stripey like a raspberry ripple ice cream. Love.

Pet pied wagtail:
My friend bought me a little pied wagtail RSPB pin. Adorable, and less mess than a pet bird. Thanks Gareth!

Still working on:
Dartmoor
On the back burner:
new Au Revoir Simone album

What gives?

If you want something doing, ask a busy person - or so the saying goes. I'm not actually sure how it applies in real life though.

As a self confessed 'busy person', I tend to have a lot on my plate and an eagerness to add even more despite my better judgement. Sadly, and even more, frustratingly, this means things just don't get done.

Example - I recently volunteered for a 5 week first aid evening class. Free, interesting, with a qualification at the end. However this took up one of my week day evenings - my precious training, volunteering or second jobbing time. Something had to give. In fact, two things 'gave' to allow me to complete the course - my training and work on my second job.

Frustratingly, this means I've lost some strength and fitness because of reduced training, and increased fatigue from the late night class room sessions. I've also lost motivation for my 'second job' and am loathe to give up my little free (read training!) time to sit at a computer and do more work. Even if that work is work I'm meant to love.

I'm burnt out. I'm not achieving my goals, or meeting deadlines I've set myself. I'm letting the side down. I feel guilty, but also far too tired to do anything useful about it other than worry.

Do you tend towards over burdening yourself with tasks, training goals, hobbies and commitments? How do you prioritise which gives and which wins in the battle for precious time?

Sometimes I just need to loose it, get wasted, do something regretable and dangerous with a stranger, walk home without shoes in the early hours and sleep for a day a night and a day.

All this exercising and clean living is KILLING ME!

Why does society insist we abandon the good times? Friends, shirk your responsbilities! Meet me in the park, bring spirits and skunk.

It'll be blast (from the past).
Teenagers will laugh at us.

Update 4/8/09
Phew. Have recovered from self-destruct mode.

Touch of class

Do you shake hands often? Through work, volunteering etc?
What does a handshake say to you?

I don't shake hands often really, but I'm an opinionated handshaker. I hate the little limp handshake (esp from men, I know, loose the gender stereotypes). I like a short handshake, firm grip, no messing about.

That I can do, but despite perfecting the short firm grip my handshake probably still comes off as all wrong. It might give folks a bit of a shock, it could cause them to pull away in revulsion even.

Why?
I have freezing cold hands, almost always.

I love it when I get to touch a warm hand, like yesterday when the guy at the deli cupped my ice cold hand in his lovely warm hand when he gave me my change. I think the massive temperature difference might have something to do with why I notice it so much - I am a bit like Rogue, draining some of his warm super power energy into my cold icy body. Wonder if he noticed my cold, cold hand?

Ever have to shake hands with an ice queen or king?
Did it give you a fright? What thoughts were you left with?

Cold hands, warm heart I hope.

Wish List

Au Revior Simone, Still Night Still Light

Bat for Lashes, Two Suns

The most expensive jeans I've ever considered buying

Strawberry blonde hair (photo)

To re-visit Dartmoor (photo)

A pet pied wagtail (photo)

On archiving & tidying up

I'm going to delete some/most of the blog archives. This has been a great space for me to make friends, start things & share happiness & pain in the past, but I'm not totally happy with having it all out there now. I've moved on from that place & the knowledge that those statements of pain & desperation are still online makes me sad.

So, if there's anything in particular you think is worth keeping let me know, otherwise it will probably be a slash and burn affair as I don't have time nor inclination to read through the 4 (wow!) years of content. I will endeavour to save most of the posts on feminism/politics/society though. x

I can't imagine deleting the blog altogether. I have a total love affair with self publishing. Maybe a slight refocusing (and redesign for funs) is required instead.

Vignette: this morning

Me: Is my face getting too thin?
L: No, it's thinner, but not too thin
Me: So I don’t look like a sunken cheeked zombie?
L: No, you look beautiful (*)
…
L: It’s funny that you’re worried about getting too thin, and I’m worried about getting fat.

(*aww!)

This weekend I...

• drove up to Northumberland
• put up my tent singlehandedly, in the dark
• led my first routes for years, including a 'severe' which was a doddle
• ticked my first outdoor 6a boulder problem
• laughed and laughed at my friend's story of waking to find slugs on his face
• temporarily stole my friends sleeping bag
• got a tick and a mosy bite. insects are grim.
• ate cereal in high winds
• got chapped lips from said winds
• took my tent down, singlehandedly in the high winds, without it blowing away (unlike my companions - and there were two of them working on their tent)
• found out I need to go to Cornwall next weekend, never a chore :)

What did you get up to over the Bank Holiday?